Amber and Aaron

Amber and Aaron

The Fun We've Already Had...

  • Graham Tomas born July 31 at 5:04 P.M. weighing 8 lbs, 12 oz.
  • December 2, 2011: PREGNANT!!!
  • Paisley Kate arrived August 21 at 5:38 P.M. weighing 7 lbs, 9 oz
  • DUE DATE: August 25, 2010!!!
  • Dec. 14, 2009- PREGNANT!!!
  • Oct. 07,2009- Had elective D&C.
  • Sept 28, 2009- No embryo on ultrasound. :(
  • Sept 15th, 2009- We found out we're PREGNANT!!!
  • Sept '09- Aaron had varicocele repair.
  • July '09- IUI #1 with HCG shot= No such luck
  • April '09- Ovarian drilling surgery, followed by hospitalization for uterine infection
  • Jan-Mar '09- metformin + 3 rounds of clomid= no ovulation
  • Dec. 11, 2008- Hysterosalpingogram (Fancy word for shooting dye through the ovaries. OUCH)
  • Nov '08- Sent to RE. Tried metformin alone for two months (No ovulation)
  • Oct '08- Diagnosed with PCOS based on amenorrhea and crazy hormone levels.
  • June '08- Aaron convinced me to start trying.
  • June '04- Got Hitched!

Friday, May 29, 2009

Does this make my butt look big?

I guess my week wasn't bad enough and I still had most of my dignity (score: one pelvic exam and no rectals), so I decided to torture myself tonight by doing the most self-deprecating thing in the world: shopping for swimsuits.

The fun starts when you finally find a suit worth trying on and realize that they don't have your size. I do appreciate that they sell tops and bottoms separately now (my booty is a little larger than my top) but I always find myself thinking that maybe, just maybe, I can fit my curvier half into a size small. I seem to have a slightly contorted self-image and a knack for making myself look ridiculous.

After I've finally collected the best choices in mostly appropriate sizes, I head for the dressing room. I feel like they purposely installed the most unflattering lighting available for this occasion. Even though I'm usually pale when trying on swimsuits, the lighting makes it even more so and suddenly I'm a little jaundiced.

Making the situation even more painful is the fact that Target has two mirrors in each fitting room, allowing you to see the "junk in your trunk". This eliminates me from pretending that even if the front isn't flattering, I'm sure that the back makes me look like a supermodel.

But amazingly, I actually found three swimsuits that I love! I went ahead and bought them all because that never happens to me. So I guess now I'm ready for Mexico next week!!!

It's interesting that last year at this time I wasn't buying new bikinis because I assumed I would be getting pregnant soon. A year later, I'm buying up all the cute bikinis I can find. I even started buying new jeans again. Bad news for our family planning, but great news for the clothing industry!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

If It's Not One Thing...

As everyone knows, I ovulated this month which is super exciting! I have to throw an except in here, because surprisingly I started my period on Sunday which was only 8 days post-ovulation. For those who have no idea why that's important, you should typically start about 14 days after you ovulate. It's just the way it should work. When you start too early, they call it a luteal phase defect meaning one of two things: my eggs are crappy quality and/or my progesterone is too low to support a pregnancy.

We know my progesterone is always a little low, but we don't know about my eggs. I'm not even sure how we find out about that. (My guess is by doing some unpleasant and expensive test). It's incredibly frustrating because you feel like you cross one finish line just to start a whole new race. One obstacle overcome, a million more still in your way. These are the times I feel like throwing in the towel and deciding that it was never meant to be.

So I called Dr. Haas this morning as I always do after cycle day 1 arrives. He wanted me to do ovulation predictor tests at home this month and then go in the day it became positive. However, we'll be in Mexico for 8 days in June and I'm 99.9% sure that it will happen while we're there if it happens at all. So this month, we'll just do the basal body temp chart as always and I go into see him on June 15th.

On a positive note, my long weekend was fantastic!!! We got to see LOTS of friends and family and had a great time. I'm thinking we should eliminate Mondays from the work week and have 3 day weekends all the time!!! So, I'll keep you all posted on what happens this month- Settle in, it looks like this story may continue for a while!

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Joining the world of ovulators

Dr. Haas just called to tell me that my progesterone level was 7.5 which means I definitely ovulated on my own!!! We want it above 10 but he said it may have decreased since I ovulated about 6 days ago. And I actually ovulated from both ovaries this month which is strange since I'm not on fertility drugs right now. I guess my ovaries just got really excited and forgot to take turns.

Crazy how you literally burn multiple holes through an ovary and then they decide to work. No one is certain about the whole process behind it, but I'm sure glad I decided to do it. Maybe we're actually getting somewhere. And the even better news is that I won't have to take provera (aka: "my crazy pills") this month!!!

Well, I've got patients to see who think that they have problems worth hearing, so I better go! Keep the prayers coming, I think it must be working!!!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Maybe some good news

So, I had my 3 week post-op appointment with Dr. Haas today. I expected the same ol' thing as usual: "Well, you still haven't started behaving as a female should, so we're moving on to ____"). However, I did have a tiny bit of hope going into the appointment today because my temp chart had a decent temp increase over the past 5 days (aka: a good sign- I won't bore you with details).

So he was excited about that, and decided to do an ultrasound to check for ovulation. He thinks I have a corpeus luteum (egg remnant) on my right ovary which means I probably ovulated on my own about 6 days ago!!! He checked my progesterone level today so I'll find out about it tomorrow. I want it to be at least 10, so we'll see. The only other time I ovulated it was only 4, so that's a poor ovulation. Let's hope for much better...

Game plan from here: We see what the test says tomorrow but if I did indeed ovulate, we wait for my period to start on its own. Or for a positive pregnancy test, but it's not likely this month since I had three healing incisions on my belly and a kickin' uterine infection. That is NOT the recipe for romance... But it would be a great sign for the future, although nothing is for certain still. Plenty of girls have regular cycles after surgery but still don't get pregnant. So, I'm hopeful, but still a little guarded about it.

I'll let you know my results tomorrow when I get them!

Monday, May 11, 2009

Anyone know the going rate on a kidney?

Bills, bills, bills. It's what my life has become. Sure, we had bills before- gas, electric, cable, etc. and it was always a bummer to have to spend all of your paycheck on those. But I was just dipping my feet into the pool of bills that I have now belly-flopped into. Seeing a repro doc isn't for the faint of heart when it comes to prices. Especially since a lot of insurances don't cover much if any of it. Mine covers 50% which still leaves me with a hefty portion. Well, we were managing that okay until the surgery and hospital stay.

Now it's yet to be known what my insurance will decide to pay and what I will pay but let's just say that the bills for surgery and my luxury 3 day stay add up to over $17,000. Crazy!!! I know insurance will deduct a bunch, pay some, and then charge me a little (That's me hoping). I'm definitely making money off my insurance finally. One point for me...

It all boils down to me not knowing how much more I can take. Financially, emotionally, physically. Now I'm in "cheap" treatment again for a while, but if the metformin and then the clomid don't work, we're in the same boat we were in. Deciding whether or not to do injectables or in vitro. Neither are in anyone's budget... And we both have really good jobs. But money is definitely not growing on any of our trees. So we're going to start signing up for every game show on TV to win some money. I'll start with Price is Right... it's my favorite and I'm not smart enough for Jeopardy!!!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

What are these...emotions???

So, having lived most of my life as a female who isn't incredibly emotional about much of anything, I'm a little confused by some recent feelings I've been having. Usually I can watch the saddest movie on the planet and make fun of it or feel annoyed by those crying around me (Ex: The Notebook). In my profession, I deal with sad things all day that I mostly handle just fine. If someone falls down, I'm more likely to laugh than to be sympathetic.

But over the past couple of days, I've felt like I was on the verge of tears several times. Not sure why... I hope this isn't all leading up to me becoming this prissy, emotional, shower-loving, mary-kay selling girl. But what I am hoping is that maybe I'm having a shift in my hormones again. And that this time the estrogen is beating out the testosterone. Sure, at some point it would be awesome to grow myself a goatee and run away with the circus/fair, but right now I just want a baby. Although I LOVE the fair!

I'm definitely anxious for my dr's appointment on the 20th of this month. He'll do an ultrasound and labwork (big surprise) so we can check for follicles (eggs). I can't even think about what will happen if this doesn't work for us. Of course we have several months of using the metformin and then adding on clomid again if that doesn't work. I actually made contact with an adoption agency this week which was a big step for me. They were nice and are sending us out information. I know it seems kinda early to be moving on to that, but it's nice to know that I have other options. You can't put all your eggs in one basket (that's what poor Aaron keeps thinking).

So, I'm going to go avoid any potentially tearful situations this evening and urge my ovaries to please start working!!! Or else they're on their way to another hysterosalpingogram (ouch!!!)

Sunday, May 3, 2009

My Unexpected Hospital Stay

So I just got to go on a wonderful 2 night, 3 day excursion to St. Anthony's due to endometritis (uterine infection). I was feeling so much better on Friday morning, but as the day went on I started to feel short of breath and my stomach started hurting more. We were to check my temp several times a day and I started to run a fever around 4 p.m. which continued to get higher, so my doc wanted to do some labwork in the ER. Plus, my heart rate was around 130 which is not good when you aren't moving...

Friday evenings in the ER are interesting. We had a fat man wearing only underwear roaming around, a very drunk man cursing and yelling, and an inmate who was probably the best behaved of the group. I actually considered vaccinating myself for a variety of diseases after just 10 minutes in the ER and probably still should. So, they started two IV's on me, drew lots of labwork, checked my urine (including a pregnancy test- aren't they funny?) and did a CT scan of my abdomen. Then, my doc came in and did a pelvic exam which showed cervical motion tenderness (aka: pain when moving my uterus) and I even got a rectal exam out of the deal.

So, after several rounds of morphine and zofran I was comfortable and they decided to admit me for further evaluation. They were actually thinking at this point that I would probably be going back in for surgery. They started me on two IV antibiotics (one of which made me break out in hives, so apparently I do have a drug allergy) and then switched it to another one. For my med friends, I was on zosyn and metronidazole. I got lots of attention, particularly during the night, and lots of blood draws which got interesting after about the 5th stick because you do eventually start to run out of veins...

My nurses were incredible and my reproductive endocrinologist proved to be the best doc I've ever had. He was up there checking on me several times a day and even called me about 5 times during my stay to check on me. I was NPO (nothing to eat or drink) during my stay so eating is now a bit of a challenge. Food makes me feel kinda sick so I haven't had anything but broth. I know you have never seen me lose my appetite, but try not to worry. This is one way to get ready for bikini time. Well, I'm home now and just trying not to do too much. Switch your prayers to Aaron now, he had to sleep on a crappy cot and he has got to have some neck and back pain. Plus, he's driving me crazy with his orders to stop trying to do stuff. He's about to go get my meds and he gave me a long list of things I am not to do... Thanks to everyone for the flowers, cards, p.j's, clothes, and even just support. You are all the greatest!!! And a special thanks to Mendy and Adam for hanging out with us in the ER once I ruined our dinner plans. Let's not ever do that again!!!