So, having lived most of my life as a female who isn't incredibly emotional about much of anything, I'm a little confused by some recent feelings I've been having. Usually I can watch the saddest movie on the planet and make fun of it or feel annoyed by those crying around me (Ex: The Notebook). In my profession, I deal with sad things all day that I mostly handle just fine. If someone falls down, I'm more likely to laugh than to be sympathetic.
But over the past couple of days, I've felt like I was on the verge of tears several times. Not sure why... I hope this isn't all leading up to me becoming this prissy, emotional, shower-loving, mary-kay selling girl. But what I am hoping is that maybe I'm having a shift in my hormones again. And that this time the estrogen is beating out the testosterone. Sure, at some point it would be awesome to grow myself a goatee and run away with the circus/fair, but right now I just want a baby. Although I LOVE the fair!
I'm definitely anxious for my dr's appointment on the 20th of this month. He'll do an ultrasound and labwork (big surprise) so we can check for follicles (eggs). I can't even think about what will happen if this doesn't work for us. Of course we have several months of using the metformin and then adding on clomid again if that doesn't work. I actually made contact with an adoption agency this week which was a big step for me. They were nice and are sending us out information. I know it seems kinda early to be moving on to that, but it's nice to know that I have other options. You can't put all your eggs in one basket (that's what poor Aaron keeps thinking).
So, I'm going to go avoid any potentially tearful situations this evening and urge my ovaries to please start working!!! Or else they're on their way to another hysterosalpingogram (ouch!!!)
But over the past couple of days, I've felt like I was on the verge of tears several times. Not sure why... I hope this isn't all leading up to me becoming this prissy, emotional, shower-loving, mary-kay selling girl. But what I am hoping is that maybe I'm having a shift in my hormones again. And that this time the estrogen is beating out the testosterone. Sure, at some point it would be awesome to grow myself a goatee and run away with the circus/fair, but right now I just want a baby. Although I LOVE the fair!
I'm definitely anxious for my dr's appointment on the 20th of this month. He'll do an ultrasound and labwork (big surprise) so we can check for follicles (eggs). I can't even think about what will happen if this doesn't work for us. Of course we have several months of using the metformin and then adding on clomid again if that doesn't work. I actually made contact with an adoption agency this week which was a big step for me. They were nice and are sending us out information. I know it seems kinda early to be moving on to that, but it's nice to know that I have other options. You can't put all your eggs in one basket (that's what poor Aaron keeps thinking).
So, I'm going to go avoid any potentially tearful situations this evening and urge my ovaries to please start working!!! Or else they're on their way to another hysterosalpingogram (ouch!!!)
If we have to start waiting hours for you to get ready before we go somewhere, shopping for expensive non flip-flop shoes (not at Payless or Kohls), doing make-overs, counting down days until the next baby/wedding shower, or showering more frequently, I will be concerned. Until then, I'm just excited that maybe all the mess you went through in the last week was worth it!
ReplyDeleteAnd I'll be doubly concerned because that would mean that you are now Emily.
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