Smiling Through the Rain

I thought that maybe I wasn't having ridiculous cravings. Sure, I've been eating a TON of Taco Bueno and fruit (not together usually ), but it's never urgent. And mainly it's been the food aversions controlling things. I still can't get near meat or the smell of meat without wanting to heave. But today, something changed. I needed pizza rolls. No, I didn't mean to say I wanted pizza rolls. Needed is the only word that fits here. It felt like I would cease to exist if I didn't get some delicious, lard-filled, golden squares that ooze with deliciousness and "mystery" meat. So, we headed to Wal-Mart. First, I reload on fresh fruit and Plum-Smart juice (the bowels have been on strike). Then, we head to the freezer section where I will find my pizza rolls. Except, the shelf is EMPTY !!! What? Where are the pizza rolls??? Now, I found cheese and supreme types, but I didn't come here for cheese or supreme. I wanted pepperoni . But there were NOOOOOO...

Aaron- I'm not too much for being overly cheesy, so bear with me on this post. I think the pregnancy hormones have made me a little more sentimental than usual, which is interesting since they've also made me a lot more mean too... I think it'd be fun to tell a little of our history for the blog readers who don't know how this twosome came to be! We met in 1998 when I was 17 and you were 18. You had no interest in me, and I decided that you were worth chasing. Mainly because you ignored me. You were about to head off to OSU and I was staying home to attend the "fancy" community college. But after visiting you in Stillwater for the year, I decided I had to follow! It was the best idea I've ever had. And after 5 years together, you finally decided to give in and propose. Problem was, I kinda acted like a turd on the night you planned to do it. Should have taught you a lesson. But you tried again the next day with me in my sweats and my "m...

I went in for my regular check-up with my OB today which was nice and anti-climactic. After 2 years of doctor's visits that included invasive ultrasounds showing an empty uterus and cystic ovaries, many blood draws, and generally bad news of some sort, it was such a welcome relief to not dread going to the doctor. (aka: "not have to shave my legs since I get to keep my pants on.") Now we already expected that things were going to go well, since I have a doppler at home that I can listen to the baby with every day (otherwise known as stalking). And sometimes two or three times a day. And luckily my baby has been very cooperative up to this point, always allowing me to at least momentarily find that adorable, little heartbeat. I realized today that it was the 1st visit in a LONG time that I haven't been pacing in the waiting room with my heart racing wondering if this was the visit that I'd hear that we'd never be able to have kids. Or that this treatment wasn...

I broke down today and shopped for some maternity clothes. I have 3 very thoughtful friends who lent me lots of excellent maternity clothes which I love. There were just a couple of other items I needed to complete the wardrobe- mainly winter clothes. Aaron and I have vowed to not buy anything baby related until much farther in, so I felt like this was jinxing us. But when nothing fit for work this morning, I knew it was time. I can't exactly let my belly hang out of my shirts. And my pants are struggling to stay buttoned and zipped. So, off I went. I find it hilarious that pregnant women no longer have actual pant sizes, you are now just classified as S/M/L/XL. Things were going well until I stumbled across the maternity bras. WTF???? What in God's green earth is that section about? I became overwhelmed, hyperventilated, got dizzy and quickly found my way out of there. I did come out of the experience with a great pair of black pants and a cute new shirt. Tonigh...

What kind of pregnancy blog (still weird saying that) is complete without embarrassing photos of the belly? I've always prided myself on my flat tummy, yet I've never been so proud of my new and quickly growing bump. I feel prettier than ever and I waited SOOO long to see my belly grow to the point where I could no longer see my nether-regions. Plus, I use to hate it when we'd eat a huge meal and my belly would hang over my pants. Now, it's already hanging over when we start eating. Awesome! So, here's my 14th week pic. I definitely had the most growth this past week. People I don't know that well are now noticing that I'm pregnant, as are most of my patients. Bad news is that they're wanting to make stuff for me and they keep touching me. YIKES!!! This is the PG-13 version with partial nudity. Viewer discretion is advised... Hard part right now is that my shirts are getting ridiculous . I have a couple of winter maternity shirts that friends...

I'm sure you all have some questions for me since I kinda left you out in the dark on the whole pregnancy thing. Which by the way was SOOOO hard. I've shared everything on my blog and to have to keep this from you was excruciating. We just decided that we didn't want our real-life people to know yet which meant not talking about it anywhere. So, I'm again sorry for leaving you out, but I know you understand. Well, I had my D&C in October and had a period 2 weeks later. My doc thought I should maybe sit one cycle out so I did and then had a period on November 17. I tracked my cycle with OPK's so I knew the day I ovulated. I continued to take my metformin three times a day (which I'm still on and will continue throughout pregnancy), but we weren't even seeing the infertility doc. I had a really good feeling about this cycle and knew I was pregnant at 3 weeks, 6 days when I started having the same dizzy feeling I had the first pregnancy. I took a t...

My dear blog readers, Those of you who know me well know that I do not keep secrets. It's actually physically impossible for me to keep a secret. So, it's going to really surprise many of you to find out that I've been staying silent about something pretty big. So, without further ado, I'd like to introduce you to the little miracle that came into our lives 13 weeks ago: We wanted to keep it to ourselves for a while to make sure things went okay this time. It's been a very terrifying 13 weeks and we are just now starting to feel that things could actually go well. We feel incredibly blessed to be pregnant with this baby and we are so grateful for every minute. To my friends who are still battling infertility , I'm not even sure where to start. You've been there with me through it all. You've held my hand and given me a shoulder to cry on when times are tough. You always know the right things to say because you've been there before. And you pray and ...

We had an awesome trip to Vegas and got home late last night. I came back to work today which was kinda nice so that I could get caught up on my paperwork and then start fresh on Monday. So, we gambled $6.00 while we were there and lost it all. Such a disappointment. :) The highlight of the trip was Garth Brooks! The concert was SOOOOO much better than I even expected. We were on the 3rd row so we were literally 10 feet from him most of the time. He came out wearing jeans, work boots, and a hoodie sweatshirt. Very casual. He sang songs that he loved growing up which ranged all over the board. Then he sang all of his best-known songs. My favorite part was his duet with Trisha Yearwood (it was Valentine's Day). They sang "In Another's Eyes" and "She's in Love with the Boy". I couldn't believe how great they sounded. Plus, I love those songs! He played his guitar and sang without a band. It was very low-key and personal. He even took ...

Aaron, my mom and I are headed off to Las Vegas tomorrow morning. He's going for his veterinary conference and I go every year because, well, it's Vegas! And how do you pass up such a fun trip? I'm even more excited because we're going to get to see Garth Brooks in concert while we're there, plus we're going to two other shows that I really want to see. One is KA (cirque du soleil) and the other is La Reve (sounds dirty, but it's not). So, I'll be taking a momentary pause from my computer time. I've been keeping up on everyone's blogs lately though, just not commenting. There's a lot going on in the lives of my blog-friends and I'll be eager to read all of your updates when I get home. That is, unless I win the big money, and then I may just disappear to a caribbean island somewhere. In that case, it was really nice knowing you all!

It was just one of those days. You know the kind. When you feel like you're the target on the show "Punked" or "Boiling Point". Something insanely impossible happens and you find yourself looking around the room for the hidden camera or waiting for the whole production crew to pop out of a plant and laugh their heads off at your misfortune. Except no one shows up. So you're left there accepting the fact that it really did just happen and someone really was that rude/stupid/inconsiderate... Maybe you'd like some details. It's my half day on Wednesdays which is very lucky because it was definitely 4 hours too many. I had a brand new patient in this morning who is from the Phillippines. Seems nice, deep accent, too many questions about my personal life. Here's how the conversation went (Her grammar was still not perfect so I'm keeping it that way for the story.) Nosy britches: "Are you married?" Me: "Yes." Her: "Any ki...