Smiling Through the Rain

We went to Target yesterday for Princess Paisley's first photo shoot and it took a little effort.... They were running behind when we got there with our very asleep baby and by the time they were ready for us, she was ready to eat. So they got her naked photos done with her eyes open, but then we had to go nurse before she would fall asleep for the rest. They turned out great though and I actually almost cried when they were taking them because 1. she's the cutest baby on the planet and 2. I'm a little more emotional with her than I've ever been before and 3. my hormones are CRAZY!!! Crazy to think that we're actually a FAMILY now!!! Look at that fat belly! I love her expression. This is my favorite shot! It was quite difficult to get because we don't have the tiniest baby, people. Might be a little more manageable with a 6 pounder... I got in trouble because I forgot to wear/bring my wedding ring... Look, it's all I can do these days to remember...

I re-read my last post or two and thought I should add in some side notes. I make it sound like this is the easiest thing I've ever done in my life, which would be FAR from true. It's definitely the most challenging thing in my life, but it's worth every second. Here's what I've learned so far about being a mom: There is no longer time in the day for a shower. I realized last night that it had been 3 days and that DHS would come and take my baby away if they realized how dirty I was... Sometimes I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. We kinda take a poll amongst ourselves and decide on what we think works best. She should have come with an instruction guide! My perineum hurts like crazy from my episiotomy. I slid in a puddle of water 2 days ago and thought I'd ripped it all open. OUCH!!! So, it's been a bit sore since then. And thanks for putting me on vaginal rest for 6 weeks, I SOOO wouldn't have thought to do so myself... :) It is po...

My milk came in yesterday big-time!!! I was starting to freak out a little because I felt like she was going to starve, but we are feeding like crazy now. She literally lives on my breast, which I actually think is amazing. Sometimes she's eating, sometimes she just wants to hang out with it, but either way- she's doing great. Breastfeeding is better than I expected, like most things pregnancy and baby related. She latches on really well (better on the left), and my nipples don't really hurt. The girls are a little huge and engorged right now, but it's a lot better when she eats. We had our first pediatric appointment today and her weight was 7 lbs, 4 oz. Yesterday at the lactation consultation, she weighed 7 lbs even, so I was SUPER excited about her gain since my milk arrived. Yep, you see it right. She's sleeping in our bed! Why you ask? Because she doesn't sleep ANYWHERE else. She likes to cuddle with her mama's breasts to sleep and then she ...

The post I have been waiting 2 years to write is finally here and I can't really believe it. On Saturday, I woke up at 8:30 a.m. with BAD contractions. By the 2nd one, I knew I was in "real" labor. They were SO different than the braxton-hicks. I got out of bed and decided that I'd take a bath, until water ran down both legs. The pain after that got pretty unbearable immediately and I was having contractions every 2 1/2 to 3 minutes. So, I called Aaron at work to tell him it was "the big day". He decided I was kidding until I nearly leapt through the phone to wring his neck. :) We got to the hospital an hour later and I was dilated to a 4 and having very active contractions. They quickly got me moved to an L&D room. I got my epidural ( AMAZING - we'll talk about this in its own post soon) at a 6 and then my doctor broke my water. (Apparently at home, it had just leaked a pocket of fluid). After he broke my water, labor started picking up ...

We had our perfect baby GIRL on Saturday after a relatively easy 8 hour labor and delivery. I'll update more later, but Paisley doesn't really understand why it was a bad idea to have a baby party the last 2 nights instead of sleep. So I'll take a nap and then give all the details and pictures. We love her so much!!!

Aaron and I went to my weekly check-up this morning which went well! My cervix last week was 1 cm and 40% effaced. Today it was 2 cm and 70% effaced. She seemed really pleased with the progress. I was hoping for 100% and 3 cm, so it fell short of my goals... all these painful, random contractions are doing something though. And apparently my cervix is really low because the checks don't hurt at all. I wouldn't even call it uncomfortable, thankfully! Gil's heartrate was in the low 120's and even upper teens today during the doppler, so she hooked me up to a non-stress test which was perfectly normal. Lots of movement and appropriate accelerations in heartrate. Still, she decided to send me downstairs for an ultrasound to check my amniotic fluid levels. (Have I mentioned that they are all super cautious with me because they're my co-workers and my history hasn't been great?) Ultrasound went really well. Alan (our tech) showed us the kidneys, heart, blad...

Gil and I have made it to 39 weeks and apparently this situation is working out so well that we've decided to just stay pregnant FOREVER !!! I have absolutely loved my pregnancy and have been enjoying it even more now that I've been off work. Thank goodness I decided to take off when I did because my sleeping is getting to be very erratic lately so I like to take random naps throughout the day and then I may or may not sleep at night. Early on, I wished for a miserable end to my pregnancy so that I would be ready to lose the bump and have the baby. Unfortunately, that has not happened and I'm going to miss the bump like crazy! However, it will be nice to be able to wear shirts that cover my stomach. And I can no longer see the stick to pee on at the doc's office. I just have to make a blind guess which can be quite a mess. :) The tank top is really trying to meet up with the shorts... Ignore the line down my side, my tank inseam left a mark. Somehow I actually ...

You have all been such an incredible support system for me that I felt like you were the right people to let in on a blog I recently started following. A newborn baby girl named Ella was born over a week ago with significant heart and lung problems. Her parents had her in Dallas to be in the best hospital to deal with her conditions. This is the same hospital that my cousin Amee went to when her twin girls were born. You might remember that one of the twins had hypoplastic left heart and ended up passing away from it after a 3-month battle. This little girl has endured one surgery already and had the 2nd this morning which did not go as expected. Please stop by their blog and offer some support and encouragement if you get a chance. I do not know them personally, but found them through a mutual friend. Of course their story struck a chord with me since we so recently went through a similar situation with little Kate. Here's the address: elladawn.blogspot.com

I decided to have a wild and crazy time this morning and look online at gender predictor tests. Early on I did a couple, but couldn't answer many of the questions yet. I think the take-home point here is that maybe, just maybe , they don't actually mean crap. Let's talk about some of the ways you should know if it's a boy or a girl: 1.) Sleeping in a bed with my pillow to the south means it's a girl. What they don't take into consideration is that we don't have another option. If we put our bed on the opposite wall, it would be blocking both our doorway and our bathroom. And what if your pillow is to the east or west? Does that just not happen? 2.) Your urine is a dull yellow color so you should expect a girl. Umm... maybe it's just because I come from a medical background, but I'm pretty sure it's because I'm well-hydrated. If I don't drink enough water, guess what happens? My urine is brighter yellow, which I guess means t...

I saw Dr. D today and everything is still looking good. I've gained an even 30 pounds with this pregnancy which he's happy about, bp is actually the lowest it's been in a while, and baby's heartrate was in the 160's. (It was higher today because I had just had a contraction which caused it to go up.) He measured me for the 1st time and I'm 40% effaced and 1 cm dilated, so my cervix isn't doing a lot at this point but it isn't completely closed! Of course, he reminded me that it doesn't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things. Baby could come today or hang in there for 2 more weeks. Who knows? I was hoping for something along the lines of 80% and 3 cm, but I guess I just have a little cervical envy... Seems like everyone else is further along at this point. I'm getting super anxious for the baby to make its grand arrival, but I'm still wishing I could stay pregnant forever. Baby Gil is happy in the uterus, and I'm just ...

How in the world did we get to 38 weeks already??? I can't believe that I found out I was pregnant over 34 weeks ago. And then in another way, it seems like it's been so much longer than that. I think part of the reason it seems like I've been pregnant forever is because I found out last August that I was pregnant the 1st time. I found out the baby didn't make it, had my D&C, and then was fortunate enough to become pregnant again right away. So, it's been pretty much continuous pregnancy for a year now. Not to mention the fact that we started trying for this baby 26 months ago. We have dreamed of this child for so long now. It seems like it will still never happen. I walk into the nursery and can't help but feel that it will never be occupied. Everything is ready for the baby to come home, yet it seems like we're just pretending. What are WE doing with a carseat in our backseat? Who are we to buy stuff at Babies-R-Us? Are we really trying to fool every...

Thank goodness I'm not usually a betting person, because I had chosen today as Gil's birthday on the calendar. Now, I realize I still have 15 days until my due date, but what a cool date today is. It's 08-09-10. Seemed perfect to me, apparently Gil has other ideas! And don't get me wrong, I'm still in no way hurrying to get this adorable baby out of there. Sorry if I haven't been returning some of your phone calls, I'm just kinda taking time to myself to enjoy my last few weeks (days?) of having "Amber-time". Aaron says that it's when I'm in "Amberland", and it means that I become a little secluded and enjoy spending time alone. For most people, they think I need constant attention and support when a big life event is underway. As an only child, I have a different way of seeing things. It usually gets on my nerves if too many people want to be around and I feel overstimulated if I don't get to be by myself now and th...

I had my weekly check-up again today and things went fine. My bp is staying stable, the holter monitor came back good this time, and baby is growing perfectly. I'm actually feeling better and better the further along I get. I'm sure some of that is due to my part-time schedule (which equals more rest) and some is my attitude that things should be okay now. Tomorrow is my last day of work before maternity leave which is crazy! I look forward to a week or two to stock up on sleep before Gil arrives.... that is, if the baby doesn't come on out. We will start checking my cervix next week, and I'm anxious to see if it's doing anything productive. Both the OB and the nurse practitioner (both co-workers of mine) are getting really excited about my upcoming delivery and were giddy today. Which made me even more ecstatic! They both told me to call if I have ANY concerns no matter what time of the day or night. And he asked if I had my bags packed. Which seems like a simpl...

Dear Gil, You and I have accomplished a full 37 weeks with you in utero!!! There were many days over the past 2 years that I doubted that I could ever be in the wonderful situation I am in now. Looking back over it all, I would do it a million times again in order to have you in my belly. My love for you is unlike anything I have ever experienced and I truly did not know that I could love someone so much without ever having laid eyes on you. (Except on ultrasound.) I would do anything to keep you safe and happy, and I am so in love with you already. We're getting rather huge these days even though I still feel good. I'm a little fearful that you're setting records in there with the way you're growing! You still kick and wiggle and roll around, and it still makes me happier than anything in this world. I just want the rest of the world to stop when you move, so I can fully concentrate on it without distraction. Sometimes I just want to keep you in there forever...

It's crazy how big I thought I was so many months ago. I'd stare at my barely poochy belly in the mirror and wonder how it could possibly get any bigger. Seemed impossible that I could get to the point I am now. In fact, I've actually had several people say that it looks painful. (It's not amazingly.) But for comparison, I thought I'd include a picture from when I was about 5 months pregnant and one taken this weekend. You might notice a little difference. :) And what's really funny about it is I actually like my pregnant body best right now. I remember telling a friend that I would always look at my naked body in wonder before every shower and she told me that I wouldn't be doing that by the end. I still do it every time I change clothes. And I still think pregnancy is beautiful! Maybe it's because I spent $9,000 and 2 years to get to this point... I'm even proud of my ovarian drilling scars, which are currently hidden from me by the bump that th...