Friday, June 7, 2013
Are most parents born with some kind of endless source of patience and never ending love for being the provider (also known as personal assistant/slave) to their kids? I feel like there are women who always love being a mom. You know the ones that say, "being a parent is the best thing I've EVER done" and "I wish there were more hours in the day to spend with my kids!"
And I so wish that I could agree excitedly with these women but I find myself looking at them like they're from outer space. I search their eyes for signs of deceit or even insanity. They look honest and heartfelt. So then I try to decide what I lack to make me feel less excited.
I have stay-at-home friends who can't imagine why I would ever return to being a PA. Maybe because its my career and something I love doing. Maybe because I like to contribute financially to this family. Maybe because I love going somewhere all alone.
I have days where this is awesome. The kids are sweet and they learn something new and they love me a ton. But there are plenty of uglier days where I feel like these two little tyrants do nothing but yell at me and criticize every move I make, every meal I serve, every word I say. It's sometimes like doing the hardest job in the world and receiving no praise or even negative comments. Day after day, it can get old.
The kids are just having a rough patch right now with lots of developmental changes and returning from a vacation and being generally busy. And I know things get better and worse all the time. I'm just having a bit of a slump right now and need to hear that I'm not the only mom who isn't screaming from the rooftops about how amazing my life is right this minute.
On that note, my son just pooped on our carpet.