Amber and Aaron

Amber and Aaron

The Fun We've Already Had...

  • Graham Tomas born July 31 at 5:04 P.M. weighing 8 lbs, 12 oz.
  • December 2, 2011: PREGNANT!!!
  • Paisley Kate arrived August 21 at 5:38 P.M. weighing 7 lbs, 9 oz
  • DUE DATE: August 25, 2010!!!
  • Dec. 14, 2009- PREGNANT!!!
  • Oct. 07,2009- Had elective D&C.
  • Sept 28, 2009- No embryo on ultrasound. :(
  • Sept 15th, 2009- We found out we're PREGNANT!!!
  • Sept '09- Aaron had varicocele repair.
  • July '09- IUI #1 with HCG shot= No such luck
  • April '09- Ovarian drilling surgery, followed by hospitalization for uterine infection
  • Jan-Mar '09- metformin + 3 rounds of clomid= no ovulation
  • Dec. 11, 2008- Hysterosalpingogram (Fancy word for shooting dye through the ovaries. OUCH)
  • Nov '08- Sent to RE. Tried metformin alone for two months (No ovulation)
  • Oct '08- Diagnosed with PCOS based on amenorrhea and crazy hormone levels.
  • June '08- Aaron convinced me to start trying.
  • June '04- Got Hitched!

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Maybe Freaking Out a Little

As the day has drawn nearer to my c-section and the birth of my 2nd child, I've started to worry panic a bit.   I'm not so much worried about my surgery.  I've assisted on plenty of caesareans and honestly, I'm kinda eager to experience a delivery in which I don't have to labor or push.  That episiotomy was nasty business to heal from and working my tail-end off for 9 hours (I know it could have been a lot longer) to deliver something big out of your hoo-ha is just not all that enjoyable to me.

But I am seriously panicked about having 2 kids.  I feel like life is finally manageable with Paisley.  She's in mother's day out now which gives me some free time.  She plays on her own some.  We all sleep through the night every single night.  This girl of mine is super funny and awesome to be around.

Yet I'm about to re-enter the "all-I-do-is-breastfeed-and-listen-to-a-baby-cry" phase of my life.  And I didn't exactly love it the 1st time when I didn't have another child to take care of.  I'm particularly dreading it now.  Even though I know it will pass and I'll have another child that's going to be fun to hang out with.  And it will be interesting for me as an only child to watch a relationship between siblings.

My scan today estimated the baby to be at 9 pounds but my doctor thinks he/she is bigger than that by feeling around on my belly.  Plus, the abdomen of this child is already over 40.5 weeks which he's worried increases our chances of shoulder dystocia.   Just not worth the risks of attempting a vaginal delivery.  And I mostly don't want to be induced only to end up with an emergency surgery.  So, it's a done deal.  Even if I go into labor tonight (cue the freaking out), he's still doing a c-section.   Good that it's not a question mark anymore.

We know we're lucky to be parents again.  This has been such a hard road and the ending is wonderful.  We're just feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment with the thought of caring for 2.  Such a huge shift in the household again.  And I don't know if the washing machine can handle another newborn puking all over every item of clothing we own!

3 comments:

  1. Oh wow. I know the feeling well. I spent pretty much my entire pregnancy with Addy in a panic. I had NO idea how we would do it. And I'm not gonna lie, it was insanely hard. But, now, looking back, I regret spending so much time worrying. I mean, I did NOT enjoy my time in the hospital with Addy because all I could think about was what the h*ll I was going to do when I got home with TWO babies?? I want a do-over, knowing what I know now. What I know now is this: you CAN do it, it WILL be hard, but it WILL also all work out. There is absolutely no usefulness in worrying - you just have to take it one day at a time and try to focus on the good in each day. I still have to do that on the hard days. I look back at the day and think about the moments that warmed my heart, made me smile, and made my kids happy:). EVERY day will have those, even the hardest ones. And the other thing I learned having two all at once - the hard phases FLY by. Just when you think you can't possibly handle the newborn, no sleep, crying phase one second longer, it is over. In the blink of an eye. You can do this!!! It is natural to be anxious...my advice is to just not let that anxiety overshadow the miracle that you are about meet:).

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  2. Ok it's going to be hard to follow Faith, but everything will be ok. You will love seeing the sibling interaction and how much Paisley will love her brother (yes that is what I am still going with and will be shocked if it is a girl ;)) Two can be hard and will be hard at times. Remember not all babies are the same either and you may get a very calm laid back baby who never cries. That is my hope for you so you can enjoy the newborn phase. Minus the 24/7 booby attachment. I have great faith in you as a mother of two and know you will be amazing at it! Just try and picture 5 years from now. How amazing life will be with your two kids.

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  3. Anxiety is totally normal! You CAN do it though! You are already proving it by being pregnant and still living your life 100% normally -- you chase after Paisley and work all the time and keep up a house and go on a vacation -- all while VERY pregnant. So if you can do that, you are already proving your strength and energy level. And you will be surprised how much just Paisley's presence will be captivating and soothing to your new baby. Kids love other kids! It will help more than you know. Hang in there, Amber, and enjoy your last week with Paisley -- your life is about to get even more wonderful! :)

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