During pregnancy, people feel compelled to give you their opinions about everything from the place you deliver to the food you eat to how much weight you've gained. I felt like delivery couldn't come soon enough so that I could stop listening to the constant tips and advice I was receiving, not to mention those who want to relive their terrible birth experiences in full detail to someone who is about to have a baby...
Paisley was born and the unwanted advice didn't stop. It didn't even slow down... in fact, it increased! Moms of newborns as well as those who now have grandkids all had passionate opinions about EVERYTHING. I have felt overwhelmed by the amount of information, both factual and craptual, that I have been bombarded with.
And let's just take a moment to realize that I'm not the kind of person who does extensive research on anything or follows the rules to a T. I think people get to wrapped up in that stuff. Aaron and I both are the kind to make last minute plans, show up late for everything, and wing it as we go. I didn't read a single pregnancy or parenting book (still haven't), only ask advice of those who I feel have reasonable ideas, and rarely stress if I'm not like everyone else. For example, I bought the carseat I bought because it's the one everyone else had so I figured it must be safe.
I let my sweet pea sleep in our bed (which I LOVE), nurse on demand, and immediately address her needs when she cries. I have no set schedule, let her stay up late (she also sleeps late), she watches TV with us at times, and I forget to do tummy time some days. And I've been told by some that I'm making mistakes. And maybe I am. But it's working for us.
Paisley and I may not do anything right or "by the books", but I know she's happy, healthy and growing. I love to read all the other blogs and see what people say about breastfeeding, formula, diapers, daycare, sleep training, development, etc. I've learned that no 2 babies are anything alike and that my baby isn't going to follow any book. There isn't a right or wrong when it comes to raising them in most areas. What they need is love, affection and a stimulating environment and I feel that they'll be just fine.
Paisley is well-loved and I can only hope that she remembers that about her childhood.
Paisley was born and the unwanted advice didn't stop. It didn't even slow down... in fact, it increased! Moms of newborns as well as those who now have grandkids all had passionate opinions about EVERYTHING. I have felt overwhelmed by the amount of information, both factual and craptual, that I have been bombarded with.
And let's just take a moment to realize that I'm not the kind of person who does extensive research on anything or follows the rules to a T. I think people get to wrapped up in that stuff. Aaron and I both are the kind to make last minute plans, show up late for everything, and wing it as we go. I didn't read a single pregnancy or parenting book (still haven't), only ask advice of those who I feel have reasonable ideas, and rarely stress if I'm not like everyone else. For example, I bought the carseat I bought because it's the one everyone else had so I figured it must be safe.
I let my sweet pea sleep in our bed (which I LOVE), nurse on demand, and immediately address her needs when she cries. I have no set schedule, let her stay up late (she also sleeps late), she watches TV with us at times, and I forget to do tummy time some days. And I've been told by some that I'm making mistakes. And maybe I am. But it's working for us.
Paisley and I may not do anything right or "by the books", but I know she's happy, healthy and growing. I love to read all the other blogs and see what people say about breastfeeding, formula, diapers, daycare, sleep training, development, etc. I've learned that no 2 babies are anything alike and that my baby isn't going to follow any book. There isn't a right or wrong when it comes to raising them in most areas. What they need is love, affection and a stimulating environment and I feel that they'll be just fine.
Paisley is well-loved and I can only hope that she remembers that about her childhood.
Yeah, I've gotten a lot of craptual advice too. :)
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you have things pretty well figured out. As long as Paisley is healthy and loved, I'd say you're doing a pretty great job of parenting her.
Good for you! In my opinion, nothing is worse than a mom who is so obsessed wtih doing EVERYTHING right that they don't take time to love their baby.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with this! I'm not an over-achiever in the research department either. I told my dad that this is going to mostly be a "fly by the seat of my pants sorta thing". LOL.
ReplyDeleteHow did people ever make it 100 years ago when there werent all of these pregnancy/baby/toddler books to learn from?? Too much information only ends up confusing me.. so I'm just going to do what feels right!
Rock on sister!!
=)
"Craptual" hahaha Love this post! You are doing everything you need to for your baby girl! Don't pay attention to anyone or anything, besides your mommy instincts and little Paisley :)
ReplyDeleteI say amen sister!!! I've read some books, but haven't followed much of the advice. I love the parenting on demand! That's totally the way I did it. Now that Emma's older we're more on a schedule, but we don't have our hearts set on 8pm bedtime every night or certain nap times! She sleeps when she's tired and eats when she's hungry. We adapt to what we've got going on, and my baby girl is super happy and healthy!
ReplyDeleteWell take it from me who has read EVERY FREAKING BOOK there is and still doesn't know what to do - every baby is different and only we (moms/dads) know what is best for our baby. The biggest thing I have learned is to NOT JUDGE other moms. I used be critical of things I would hear moms doing. "OMG, they let the baby sleep in their bed??? Terrible..." Now?? I know better. I slept for 3 hours last night with my baby girl cuddled right next to me - it was the best sleep either of us had gotten in a while. I can't judge how others do it because I'm doing things that I never thought I'd do and that I know is right for us. People just need to shut up!! And maybe we need to just smile and say "Everything's great" when they ask about sleeping and feeding. They don't need to know our methods. If one more person asks me if she's sleeping through the night, I'll scream! So now I just say "She's doing great!" and not get into details.
ReplyDeleteHi- I've never commented on your blog, but haven enjoyed reading it- Paisley is adorable! This was a great post- I have an 8 week old boy, and have been so stressed about doing everything "right". My mom, who raised 5 healthy, happy, successful kids, gave me the best advice the other day. She said- babies develop not just because of us, but in spite of us. That was such a relief to hear- and now I don't feel so guilty watching Gray's Anatomy on the DVR with him instead of listening to Mozart. Have a great weekend!
ReplyDeleteOh advice...gotta love it! I totally agree, every baby is different AND every parent is different! I crave routine and a schedule so it only made sense to put Elliott on a schedule, but sometimes I wish I was a little more spontaneous like you. :) I also love reading the books, but I've found that sometimes they can make things even more confusing and make me doubt my gut, so you're probably smart not reading them.
ReplyDeleteWell, here's some more advice....make the most of every second b/c it goes too fast. I think that you both are totally doing that. That, in my opinion, is all that matters!
ReplyDelete