It just isn't the holidays if my idiotic bio-dad doesn't show up with his trashy wife and wreak havoc at my Grandma's house...
I've described him as the "black sheep" of the family on this blog before and I can't reiterate enough how I think this term was actually invented specifically for him. He seems to have made it his life's goal to prove that he is the black sheep every chance he gets.
Thanksgiving morning we always go out to my Grandma's house, including my mom even though she and my dad have been divorced 30 years. She is definitely more welcome than he is. This was the 1st year without my Grandpa so that was tough, and everyone was on their best behavior. It's a huge family with tons of cousins and lots of great-grandkids. It's always been my favorite place to celebrate the holidays. Of course, we have little family fights. One year, it was over the gravy. Another it was about gloves.
But then Black Sheep and Mother Trucker (she's a truck-driver) show up and try to ruin the festivities. Even though it's only noon, he's already been indulging himself in some substances so he quickly "falls asleep" in a lawn chair in the backyard. She came sauntering into the house wearing a leather, zip- up, biker type shirt that was not zipped up nearly enough. And had nothing on underneath it. My eyes are still burning from seeing that. Pretty sure I'll never be the same again.
Meanwhile, Black Sheep wakes up after being encouraged to move into a lower piece of furniture in case of a fall and starts trouble as usual. He is told to leave by multiple family members and so Mother Trucker does what any good wife would do and drags him out to their car. We luckily never saw anything else of him.
But she comes back in to start drama with her daughter (my half-sister) and ends up leaving too. But not before loading up a gigantic plate of food to take. Aaron thinks they treat it like a soup kitchen and just come get their bellies full and then leave to go no telling where.
What would the holidays be without a couple of crazy relatives???
I've described him as the "black sheep" of the family on this blog before and I can't reiterate enough how I think this term was actually invented specifically for him. He seems to have made it his life's goal to prove that he is the black sheep every chance he gets.
Thanksgiving morning we always go out to my Grandma's house, including my mom even though she and my dad have been divorced 30 years. She is definitely more welcome than he is. This was the 1st year without my Grandpa so that was tough, and everyone was on their best behavior. It's a huge family with tons of cousins and lots of great-grandkids. It's always been my favorite place to celebrate the holidays. Of course, we have little family fights. One year, it was over the gravy. Another it was about gloves.
But then Black Sheep and Mother Trucker (she's a truck-driver) show up and try to ruin the festivities. Even though it's only noon, he's already been indulging himself in some substances so he quickly "falls asleep" in a lawn chair in the backyard. She came sauntering into the house wearing a leather, zip- up, biker type shirt that was not zipped up nearly enough. And had nothing on underneath it. My eyes are still burning from seeing that. Pretty sure I'll never be the same again.
Meanwhile, Black Sheep wakes up after being encouraged to move into a lower piece of furniture in case of a fall and starts trouble as usual. He is told to leave by multiple family members and so Mother Trucker does what any good wife would do and drags him out to their car. We luckily never saw anything else of him.
But she comes back in to start drama with her daughter (my half-sister) and ends up leaving too. But not before loading up a gigantic plate of food to take. Aaron thinks they treat it like a soup kitchen and just come get their bellies full and then leave to go no telling where.
What would the holidays be without a couple of crazy relatives???
LOL " Mother Trucker." Sorry none of this is probably actually funny, but I couldn't help but laugh at the outrageous-ness of it all :) Sorry you have to experience that!! That leather bike zip up shirt sounds amazing. Maybe Santa will bring us both one :)
ReplyDeleteWow!.. That sounds like a rootin rootin good time! Your mom must be really as Thay she let that one get away 30 years ago. Sounds kinda like the way my life could've turned out if I had married any of the guys I dated back in high school. Phew! Barely missed that lovely way of life. : )
ReplyDeleteSorry your grandpa wasn't there. :( thats the suckiest part of all I'm sure!
Xoxo
Rootin tootin*
ReplyDeleteMust be really sorry she let that one get away*
....darn this iphone!
Wow, lol. I just have to laugh. We don't have family here so we celebrate with friends that we consider "family." But they judged our parenting all day and made me miserable as usual. Gotta love the holidays!
ReplyDeleteWow that puts my family drama to shame!!!!
ReplyDeleteSorry about your grandpa not being there.
Once again you have successfully made me pee my pants. :O) Love the nicknames, couldn't be more perfect. I know the loss of a grandparent and I wish each year it gets better but with me is hasn't. Just know they are watching over you and still love you very much. The void will never get filled with a grandpa's kind of love but the memories will forever live on. Love you.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry you had drama! I know the feeling of missing someone during the holiday season that was dear to you. This was the first Thanksgiving without my Aunt. I thoroughly enjoy reading your blog, though. You have such a way with words.
ReplyDeleteI have chosen you for a Liebster Blog Award! Follow the link to get it! :)
http://www.heart-of-homemaking.com/2011/11/liebster-blog-award.html